Campaign against ready made food, Stop ready meals and foodborne diseases
 
 
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NEWS and FUN

Result of the vote for

THE MOST STUPID NEWS 2006

"Organic poultry is less nutritious, contains more fat and tastes worse than its mass-produced equivalent, research has claimed"
Science Reporter Fiona Macrae in DAILY MAIL, December 4, 2006
... other newspapers reported as well...

This information is based on a research by Dr. Alistair Paterson of Strathclyde University (which is published in the International Journal of Food Sciences and Nutrition).
Dr. Peterson explains, that the battery chicken are much more nutritious, because they are fed with synthetic vitamin supplements... (not to mention antibiotics)and these supplementations are banned under the strict farming rules of the Soil Association.
I am sure the Food Standard Agency (FSA) loves the outcome of this "research".

And careful: The next research with this kind of outcome might have the following sponsorlist:
"Association of Chicken Cage Producers"
Campaign "Battery-Hens? YES PLEASE"
The Ready Meal Association
The European Pharmaceutical Industry (Division: Antibiotics)
The Food Standard Agency
"Keep-The-Customer-Stupid" Campaign
The Health Care Public Relation Association (Division "Buy a journalist")




The Ready-Meal Christmas Dinner-Adventure

With Detox Advice

__________________________________________


Starter:

CRISPY DUCK AND SPRING ROLL ORIENTAL BANQUET with “product recall guarantee”. Anaphylactic shock (allergic shock) absolutely not guaranteed but possible anyway…

…wrapped in HEALTHY LIVING PLAIN TORTILLA with the chance of ‘surprise glass fragments in food’.

For the second starter we recommend NORTHERN CATCH SEAFOOD STICKS with the possibility of microbial contamination. And the really big adventure here is: they do not tell you which microbes…


Main:

For the little ones:

TODDLER’S OWN SWEET POTATO & BEEF CASSEROLE 250g (Stage 3 for 12 months+) with milk (not listed on the ingredients list). A real surprise for the little ones who suffer from milk allergies or lactose intolerance.

For the grown-ups in a hurry:

“BACILLUS CEREUS and MSG SURPRISE” available from many take away outlets.

For the grown-ups at home:

1. SUPER NOODLE – CHICKEN FLAVOUR with the possible presence of hard white plastic in the flavouring sachet… and with the guarantee that the product does not contain any chicken.

2. NON BSE TESTED STEAK… for all lovers of Creutzfeld-Jacob. Additional adventure: wrong use-by dates

3. FROZEN FISH… with histamines – for friends of scombroid poisoning

And have all together with some GARLIC AND SPECIALITY BREAD… and you find some metal in it.


Dessert:

HAWAIIAN MIX SNACK with the possible contamination by moth larvae/cocoons.


Consumers do not have to worry, because some celebrity nutritionist promote ready-meals and one of them even has his own brand of ready meals. So they must be healthy! And you always have the chance to do a Gillian McKeith 24-hours-detox, which might be replaced this January with a 60-minute-detox for those who
a) can’t live without alcohol or rubbish food for longer than an hour and b) for those who think Gillian McKeith knows what she is doing.


Do not worry too much! You will not find any warning in the media. These UK-journalists ignore the www.stop-readymeals.com campaign for many reasons. (One might be that they are a main consumer group of ready meals)

But you can be sure that you will find lots of advice for “Detox 2007”, “Superfoods 2007” or other useless rubbish in the newspapers/magazines. One thing some journalists ARE good at: confusing consumers by researching topics for approx. 24 minutes and then writing about it as 'experts'. Some "journalists" are extremely good at claiming free treatments (without giving anything in return...off course)… and some or more than some still prefer to write about "sensational crap" rather than "boring facts"... oops that's three things…



LONDON LITE, 13 October 2006

McDonald's? We're loving them again by Bill Condie

"Britons are flocking back to McDonald's, undeterred by health scare stories or attacks from the likes of celebrity chef Jamie Oliver. The company has reported sales across Europe soaring by 7.6% in the latest quarter, and British restaurants were responsible for the lion's share of that..." (unquote)

Slogan suggested from H.P.S. in E. "McDonald's - I'm vomiting it!"


THE TIMES, 13 October 2006

EU milk testing row escalates

"A row over food safety in the £ 5.6 billin dairy industry has deepened as the European Comission begins legal action to force stricter testing for antibiotics in British milk products (David Charter writes).
The Food Standard Agency has been accused of ignoring demands from Europe to bring in more robust testing after the discovery of tainted cheese exported from a processing plant in Lancashire.
All fresh milk hs to pass a quick test showing that no antibiotics are present to qualify for sale. The row centres on milk that has failed this test and is sold on to processing plants" (unquote)

How dare to accuse the FSA which is so independent and not prone to influences from lobbyists.


By the way QUORN is a fungus (Fusarium venetarium)... Athlete's foot is a fungus too... Now this is probably too confusing for vegetarians :-)

Have a look at unileverfoodsolutions.co.uk/sales/build_margin/essentials and you will see a fantastic chili-con-carne-ready meal picture. Sometimes companies have remarkable and astonishing beautiful photographies to sell us their "food". Here they use a completely new strategy... Have a look and send us your ideas how you would describe this picture.
Here is one example: "looks like someone left his/her poo on a rotten potato. Call Gillian McKeith for an analysis!"
Unilever says "Success relies on using quality ingredients". How true...


And after so many READY MEALS why not trying one of the 4.5 billion "one-fits-all-diets with guaranteed abyssmal long-term success"
(all following diets are real... they exist!)
Atkins Diet, Blood Type Diet, Breatharian Diet, Buddhist Diet, Cabbage Soup Diet, Calorie Restriction Diet, The Cambridge Diet, Dr. Hay Diet, Duke University Diet, Feingold Diet, Fruitarian Diet, The Diet Of Dr. Joel Fuhrman, Gerson Diet, The Graham Diet, Grapefruit Diet, Hallelujah Diet, Hollywood Star Diet, Hunza Diet, Israeli Army Diet, Junk Food Diet, Kosher Diet, Low-Copper Diet, Macrobiotic Diet, Mediterranean Diet, Metabolic Typing Diet, Montignac Diet, Muslim Diet, Natural Foods Diet, Natural Hygiene Diet, Negative Calorie Diet, Okinawa Diet, Ornish Diet, Popcorn Diet, The Food Doctor Diet.

Here are some ideas for new diets (please help us to complete this list and send in your recipes :-)

The German Bratwurst Diet, The Ingest-And-Digest-Under-Water Diet, Penguin Egg Diet, Dr. Mupplewafer's Eat-What-You-Want-And-Gain-Weight Diet, Super Omega 3, 6, 9, 33, 35, 42 (bonus no: 13) Diet, Salmonella Diet, and the "Eat Only Foods Beginning With An 'F' Diet" (Gordon Ramsay help!)